Wednesday 17 September 2008

How To Prepare for an Exam

  1. Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a well-lighted place with a computer in front of you.
  2. Open your web browser of choice.
  3. Check your emails. Reply to any that need attention.
  4. Check out what's happening on Facebook. Write on some friends walls and accept an invitation to a group.
  5. Check your blog reader.
  6. Write a post on your blog responding to a blog-post you just read.
  7. Pull the bottle of water out of your backpack and begin to wish that you had some energy drink.
  8. Start planning a trip down to the cafeteria to buy some energy drink.
  9. Decide to make a good start on your exam preperation before you treat yourself with such a treat.
  10. Open your text-book.
  11. Open your excercise book.
  12. Write the date at the top of the page and then look for the ruler to underline it so it looks neat.
  13. Use the text-book as a ruler because you left your ruler at home, propping up a little tomato-plant you're trying to grow.
  14. Yawn.
  15. Check your emails again.
  16. Check your blog reader again.
  17. Check to see if anyone has txted you.
  18. Txt some friends to see if they want to catch up and eat some wedges with sour-cream later.
  19. Look out the window and feel sorry for yourself, stuck inside studying on such a wonderful day.
  20. Examine your fingernails.
  21. Massage your knee-caps because your legs are feeling stiff.
  22. Go fill up the water-bottle in the toilets.
  23. Sit back down at the desk, ready to study again.
  24. Quickly check emails and blog-reader again.
  25. Reply to an urgent email.
  26. Flick through the text-book, muttering short meaningless prhases to yourself.
  27. Rest your head in your hands and groan.
  28. Find a PDF of the exam from last year on the University's website and download it.
  29. Question one... Huh, you haven't come across that concept before.
  30. Bring up Wikipedia and search for some info about the concept.
  31. Just quickly check your emails again while that page is loading.
  32. Bring up the default University homepage on the screen so nobody comes along and reads your emails, and then get out of your nice comfy (sweaty) chair, slip your jandals back on and then head down to the cafeteria to buy a bottle of energy drink. Because you're worth it...

To heck with study. Look, what I've figured out is, the way to do really well at exams is just to make sure you get plenty of sleep (during the day), and also watch thought-provoking movies which may trigger your subconcious to start thinking about the things you learned? in the lectures. Your learning process should be natural and integrated into your everyday life. If your brain wants to turn to thoughts of study, then that is the ideal time for the concepts and ideas to be really solidified in your mind. Turn up at your exam without having done any preperation, and you will find that your style will be more natural, and not forced as if you have just been studying all day for it. Take a blimmin bottle of energy drink in with you, and it will help you remember things that you never even learned.

6 comments:

  1. You didn't happen to be inspired for this by a person going by the name of Gabby, did you Andy?
    Isabella ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. what are you talking about? ;)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ummmm.... Nothing in particular.
    Isabella

    ReplyDelete
  4. Love it!! Minor variations here and there, but pretty accurate, for exams, assignments, essays, whatever. Guess what I should be doing right now as I write this...

    ReplyDelete
  5. Energy drink will help you remember what you haven't even learnt? No wonder... that explains it!

    ReplyDelete

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