The Hitchiker
One day, as the truck driver was driving along he saw a priest hitchhiking. He thought he would do a good turn and pulled the truck over. He asked the priest, "Where are you going, Father?"
"I'm going to the church 5 miles down the road," replied the priest.
"No problem, Father! I'll give you a lift. Climb in the truck." The happy priest climbed into the passenger seat and the truck driver continued down the road. Suddenly the truck driver saw a lawyer walking down the road and instinctively he swerved to hit him. But then he remembered there was a priest in the truck with him, so at the last minute he swerved back away, narrowly missing the lawyer. However even though he was certain he missed the lawyer, he still heard a loud "THUD". Not understanding where the noise came from he glanced in his mirrors and when he didn't see anything, he turned to the priest and said, "I'm sorry Father. I almost hit that lawyer."
"That's okay", replied the priest. "I got him with the door!"
Charity
A local charity had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The director called to get a contribution.
"Our records show you make $500,000 a year, yet you haven't given a penny to charity," the director began. "Wouldn't you like to help the community?"
The lawyer replied, "Did your research show that my mother is ill, with medical bills several times her annual income?"
"Um, no," mumbled the director.
"Or that my brother is blind and unemployed?" The stricken director began to stammer an appology.
"Or that my sister's husband died in an accident," said the lawyer, his voice rising inindignation, "leaving her penniless with three kids?"
The humiliated director said simply,"I had no idea."
"So, if I don't give any money to them, why would I give money to you?"
A local charity had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The director called to get a contribution.
"Our records show you make $500,000 a year, yet you haven't given a penny to charity," the director began. "Wouldn't you like to help the community?"
The lawyer replied, "Did your research show that my mother is ill, with medical bills several times her annual income?"
"Um, no," mumbled the director.
"Or that my brother is blind and unemployed?" The stricken director began to stammer an appology.
"Or that my sister's husband died in an accident," said the lawyer, his voice rising inindignation, "leaving her penniless with three kids?"
The humiliated director said simply,"I had no idea."
"So, if I don't give any money to them, why would I give money to you?"
I'd only ever heard that first one before about running down an Aborigine, not a lawyer. For some strange reason people will find it funny about a lawyer, but you'd probably get highly offended comments if you published it about an aborigine. Political correctness I suppose.
ReplyDeleteLike shooting fish in a barrel...
ReplyDeleteHello there!
ReplyDeleteI would like to take a quick moment to tell you about something that is very close to my heart. I was hoping that it might be possible for you to help me. Please read this recent post of mine:
http://drpaleophd.blogspot.com/2009/02/its-finally-go-time.html#links
If you care about America and our freedom, you will be very concerned.
Spencer
P.S. And if you find that you agree with the concerns I expressed in my blog post, please blog this yourself, and let's spread the word!